Valentine’s Day & Tribute to my Husband

Valentine’s Day is a great day to show love to others.  Even though it has been become so commercialized, we should focus on loving year round.

The day that goes back to early Christian martyrs and in recent times became a day of celebrating love and exchanging gifts,  I think it has turned into a day to trap husbands if they don’t measure up to the world’s standards. I fell into that trap of thinking about all the things he should do for “me”.  Because I always go out of the way to show him how much I love him….surely he should show “me” how much he loves me by the standards of flowers, candy, romantic dinner, and cards….my love language.

Do you know how many Valentine’s Days I wasted pouting because he didn’t always do what “I” thought he should do?  That is right, this “encouraging” homemaker was selfish and immature because my husband wasn’t following what the world has said was a way to show love.

{Let me clarify…he didn’t just overlook the holiday and say it was foolish. He wanted to treat me special, he just wasn’t sure how. He grew up in a home that any type of holiday celebrated was foolish and “wordly”.}  He is learning, after almost 15 years of celebrating and “every day is a celebration” of love in our home. 🙂

Hello???  What about the other 364 days of the year when he was showing me how much he loved me by being a godly leader and husband, tender and kind father?  Putting in a load of laundry when he walks in the door, or unloading the dishwasher because he wants to make things easier for me. Fixing me a cup of tea or running a hot bath because I needed to unwind {in this farmhouse, running a bath is an act of love…old tub, old hot water heater=boiling pots of water on the stove so the bath will last more than 5 minutes}.

What about the way he is patient with me when I get frustrated over silly little things? The way he leads our family in the ways of God and helps me to become the woman God wants. The hours he spends in prayer for his family. The ways he wants to be with his family, instead of hanging out with friends.  The way he is patient when I have to spend hours with my sick father, so he watches the kids for me.  Or how he takes my dad out to eat each week so he can get out of the house.

What about the way he tenderly listens to my frustrations as a mother that I am failing…as I confess how I lost my temper with our boys that day or I wasn’t patient during a hard lesson for them.

How about the way he keeps the yard mowed and the weeds under control and makes sure the car is in good condition so I will be safe.

The way he is patient that our home has been a mess when we have gone through the worst year of our life and just surviving became a top priority. The way he never fusses if there are no clean forks or it is suppertime and I was too sick that day to think about supper. How patient he has been the past 2 months while I have been so sick with kidney stones and unable to do much for our family, so he took up the slack.

How can I overlook the way he would get up with our sons in the middle of the night when they were babies and change their diaper so I could sleep a little longer? Or how about recently when our son didn’t make it to the bathroom when he was sick, so my husband was on his hands and knees cleaning the remnants of a chicken sandwich off the floor. Or the way holds a cloth to our sons’ heads when they are sick. I look at that and cry, because he never had anyone do that for him…ever…until we were married.

What a sacrifice of love he makes each week when he gets up at 4:30am to drive an hour to the Men’s Bible Study so he can grow deeper in his faith and become a better husband and father. Or how he meets with other men in an accountability group so he can be sure he is being the man God wants him to be.

How it touches my heart to remember the years of extra jobs he worked to provide for our family during difficult seasons. Or the way he now works on the farm, even though he told my dad he was no farmer when we were dating.  How he loves working close to home so he can be near us and work with our sons, teaching them things they need to know to become a man.

I love how he works with our sons, teaching them necessary skills to survive in this world, but most importantly, training them in the ways of God.  Playing ball with them or riding around the farm with the boys when he feels like falling asleep after a hard day, all the while creating a deeper relationship with them. Showing the boys a beautiful musical piece on the piano that he composed. Teaching them that is is okay to be quiet, that we must at times be still to hear what God has to say.

I am blessed beyond words to have a man that loves me every day of the year…not just one day set aside to show love. I am thankful that God blessed me with such a man. I am thankful for his patience and leadership in our home. I pray that I will love unconditionally, as he does.

How amazing to me that this man~who never knew love, never was shown love~ shows the love of God so freely. He has spent the last 14 years showing me what love really is.

You might enjoy these related posts:

Real Love Looks Like What?

Valentine’s Day: Making Your Family Feel Special

Our Love Story

Beauty Through Trials

With love,

Mary

Linking up with: Motivation Monday, A Handful of Heart, The Better Mom, Your Thiving Family, Momma Made it Easy, Comfy in the Kitchen, Women Living Well, Deep Roots at Home, Growing Home, Time Warp Wife, A Holy Experience, Raising Homemakers, Gratituesday,Raising Mighty Arrows, Homemaker’s Cottage