As moms, we always put others first. Because that is what we do. We love others and try to take care of them. But somewhere in the midst of it all, we have to take care of ourselves.
It is not selfish. It is not bad. It is necessary. And it is a lesson that I learned hard this December. I am still learning it.
I have been saying this and talking about it. I even wrote about it in our ebook, The Pursuit of Motherhood…
“This goes against our beings as moms. We are always putting our family first, which is the way God designed us. Taking time for you is not selfish. This is necessary to your sanity and survival, as well as the functioning and happiness of the home.
Like they tell you on the airplane, put on your oxygen mask first before you help your child. What good will you be if you don’t protect yourself? The same is true for your health. You will not be able to function or feel well if you don’t look out for your basic needs. This is especially true if you have health problems.”
I know this, I wrote it. But I wasn’t doing it.
Life has been somewhat crazy here for several years. Trials, extended family difficulties, business, sickness all added to the craziness. I have been helping others stay healthy and keeping my family healthy. The things I do and talk about work and help you stay fit and healthy. But you have to use them and put what you know works into practice. Always a catch, huh? 🙂
So, December came and I could hardly go. Sick. Physically and emotionally. I was worn out. I wasn’t taking care of myself.
I had not been eating properly, drinking enough water, getting enough sleep or using my supplements like I recommend to everyone else. I wasn’t taking care of myself so I could help others. I have always struggled with health problems and I have to be proactive to stay healthy. But I wasn’t doing that. I was extremely tired and just wanted to sleep.
But who has time for sleep when you have so much to do and so many people need you? Right?
WRONG!
What happens when we don’t take care of ourselves, moms? We get worn out. We get overwhelmed and exhausted. We get grouchy. Our kids wish “sweet mom” would come back. We get sick and everything is too difficult. We don’t laugh much and life isn’t very fun.
It is time to put more value on you as a mom. Take care of yourself. Take care of the blessing that God has given your children through you. Take care of yourself so you can be the wife that your husband wants and needs.
Simple Ways to Start Taking Care of Yourself:
Quit Thinking and Speaking Bad about Yourself~ Not what you thought would be at the top of the list? This is very important. We need to quit devaluing ourselves…saying things like “I am lazy”, “I’m stupid” or “I’m fat and ugly”. Your brain hears everything you say and doesn’t differentiate whether it is false or true. Quit judging yourself. Quit putting yourself down. We need to speak life!! God made you. He loves you. He sent His son to die for you. You are His precious treasure and He loves you very much!
Make Priorities ~ What is really important in your home and family? Where does your health and sanity fit in? Is it necessary to be involved in every activity coming and going just because everyone else is or you don’t want your child to miss out?
Write everything out. Put what really matters to your family and vision for your family in one column. Put what you enjoy and feel like you need to keep in the middle column. Put things that are optional and really don’t matter in the scheme of things in the last column. Get rid of the last column. Ditch it for the health and sanity and happiness of your home.
Make time for fun, relaxation and memory making time in your home. The kids really want time with you. They may not say it or let you know. They just want time.
Drink Water ~ It is important to stay hydrated with fresh water. Try to drink at least 8 glasses of water a day. Starting off the day with warm water and fresh lemon is a good way to support the immune system.
Eat Healthy ~ Do you know what I do when I get stressed out, have deadlines to meet and am exhausted? I want junk food. Like Chocolate and a local made soft drink, Cheerwine kind of unhealthy food. Not healthy chocolate, milk chocolate. I have no desire for healthy food when I get like this and it is like I rebel against all things healthy.
How ridiculous is that??? I get into this crazy cycle…stress…junk…feeds a sugar addiction…feel yucky…grab for junk. It is a mess of a cycle to get caught in. And all the while I keep feeling worse and worse. And I wonder why?
Quit bringing junk in the house. Say no to junk food. An occasional treat is fine, but if it makes you feel bad and get hooked, stay away!
This all comes down to a choice I need to make BEFORE I get into this little mess. Eat healthy, keep healthy snacks around, don’t keep junk food around, be intentional about being healthy. And when you do fall off the wagon…don’t beat yourself up …that goes back to point number one…quit speaking bad about yourself.
Sleep ~ Really. This is so important. I have been burning the candle on both ends and let me be the first to tell you, it isn’t smart. You will pay for it. I used to do that in college and it was tough. With all the demands in my life lately, I have been doing the same thing. I can’t keep up like I could 20 years ago. Am I that old? Yep. And getting older even faster because of a lack of sleep. Sleep is very important to your health. We need more than we get.
Rest when you can. Take a power nap. Sleep when the baby sleeps. Go to bed by 10 pm. Read before you go to bed. Listen to soft music. Diffuse essential oils to help you rest.
Exercise ~ This will help you physically and mentally. This will help keep you healthy and in shape, and it will also help your attitude. You can exercise for 15 minutes a day and see results. The thought of jumping around and punching the air like crazy makes me just shut down…and then I need some chocolate to revive me again.
Walking and rebounding are simple and will help pump the lymphatic system that will in turn make you feel better.
My favorite healing exercise is T-Tapp. It has helped me overcome many health challenges and makes me feel great. It can be done in 15 minutes–really! It was designed for people with health challenges, but even the most fit people get a big workout from it. Weight is not a focus, but you will be shocked at the inches you lose as your body is healing from the inside out. (Sadly the company is in probate after the owner died and you can’t purchase them from there… I’ll be sharing about ones I have for sale for anyone interested in this amazing fitness program.)
Do Something That You Enjoy ~ What is something you enjoy? A warm bath, reading, scrapbooking, going out to eat with close friends? Love a massage? Actually, a massage is more than just for fun. It is very important for your health, so try to get one when you can or tell your hubby that would be a great birthday gift. Indulge every now and then in something you enjoy to refresh yourself. You will be a better mom.
Taking care you you, mom, is important. You are a very important part of your home… you help to set the tone and attitude. Many people are depending on you. The most important people in your life look to you to meet their most basic needs and to love them. What you do everyday is so important, whether you believe it or not.
It is hard to have people pull on you when you do not feel well and you are so exhausted. Sometimes you just want to scream!!! Your family needs you. God put you in a very important and special position, mom. No one can do what He designed you to do for your family.
Don’t overlook your importance in the family. Take care of yourself and stay healthy. Build memories together and have fun!! We can do this, moms!!
Your turn: What are your favorite tips for staying healthy?
Is motherhood hard? Can we do this job? Join 16 moms on their journey. Read their struggles, fears, joys, passion and tips for the important job of motherhood. Learn more about The Pursuit of Motherhood here.
Sharing at Christian Mommy Blogger, Missional Women, A Mama’s Story, The Modest Mom, My Joy-Filled Life, Time-Warp Wife, Growing Home, Richly Rooted, Walking Redeemed, Raising Arrows, A Wise Woman Builds Her Home, & Raising Mighty Arrows.
Thank you so much for this today. God spoke through you today. Your honestly is so refreshing and it feels so good to not feel alone in this.
You are so welcome. I am so glad that it helped you see that you are not alone. We are in this together. Hugs and prayers!!
I’m in the same boat. I know I try to do too much, and I know what I’m supposed to do, but I seem to have a lot of trouble stopping. And even when I do little things right, its not enough to help.
Mary,
When I visit, I seldom have a moment to leave a message, but I just have to say ‘Thank you’ for what you do to pour into the lives of women. As one other reader said, you are refreshing and convicting. Thanks for encouraging me today 🙂
God’s blessings (and hugs) for the new year ahead!